Being a single mom by choice is not for the faint of heart, since parenting has always had its challenges, ups and downs, benefits and rewards.
As a single mom by choice, you have made the conscious decision to have a child (either through donor conception or adoption) without a partner or significant other.
By going into parenthood on your own, you are solely responsible for every aspect of your child(ren)’s life – nutrition and health, growth and development, education, religion, and medical/dental/vision needs. While a two parent home can be helpful when both partners are invested in caregiving, as a single mom by choice you are the sole caregiver and your child(ren) will rely upon you for everything.
Therefore, becoming a single mom by choice is not a decision that should be made lightly – it is a lifetime commitment and irrevocable. Having a child will change many aspects of your life and there will be times when you feel great stress and hardship, especially if you are not yet financially secure and have little to no support system in place for help when needed.
Women who go on to become single moms by choice are typically the most prepared, responsible and independent types of parents. Such mothers have made every effort to become financially stable, take care of their own physical and mental health, and learn the ins and outs of child raising in order to become the best mothers they can be.
In contrast, the often idealized two parent household is rarely a true reality these days. Oftentimes, working and stay-at-home mothers alike are still the main caregiver, but have the extra burden of taking care of her significant other, as well. Many times, problems within the parental relationships create a dysfunctional or toxic environment which tends to carry forward into the co-parenting relationship if the parents end up divorced.
As a single mom by choice, you have the freedom to parent and raise your child according to your own morals and standards. There is no one to argue with you about bedtimes, how to discipline, or which preschool is best for your little one. By beginning your own little family, you have given yourself time to find Mr. or Mrs. Right and your child(ren) will learn that it’s possible to have a happy, fulfilling life without settling for the wrong type of relationship. You will be able to model healthy relationships through your interactions with your child(ren) and any adult relationship you choose to maintain once you are ready to begin dating.
SingleMomsByChoice.org is run by single moms by choice for single moms by choice, dedicated to helping educate, enlighten and empower women who are thinking about or who have decided to have a child “on their own” through donor insemination, egg or embryo donation, adoption or other assisted means.